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Writing sensible email messages

Writing sensible email messages

As we’ve seen before, getting your inbound email under control will give you a huge productivity boost, but what about all the emails you send? If you want to be a good email citizen and ensure the kind of results you’re looking for, you’ll need to craft messages that are concise and easy to deal with.

First: Understand why you’re writing

Before you type anything into a new message, have explicit answers for two questions:

  1. Why am I writing this?
  2. What exactly do I want the result of this message to be?

If you can’t succinctly state these answers, you might want to hold off on sending your message until you can. People get dozens, hundreds, even thousands of emails each day, so it’s only natural for them to gravitate toward the messages that are well thought-out and that clearly respect their time and attention. Careless emails do not invite careful responses.

Think through your email from the recipient’s point of view, and make sure you’ve done everything you can to try and help yourself before contacting someone else. If it’s a valuable message, treat it that way, and put in the time to making your words count.

Get what you need

Although the possible topics and content of messages are theoretically endless, I’d propose that there are really just three basic types of business email.

  1. Providing information - “Larry Tate will be in the office Monday at 10.”
  2. Requesting information - “Where did you put the ‘Larry Tate’ file?”
  3. Requesting action - “Will you call Larry Tate’s admin to confirm our meeting on Monday?”

It should be clear to your recipient which type of email yours is; don’t bury the lede. Get the details and context packed into that first sentence or two whenever you can. Don’t be afraid to write an actual “topic sentence” that clarifies a) what this is about, and b) what response or action you require of the recipient.

Since the Larry Tate meeting on Monday has been moved from the Whale Room, could you please make sure the Fishbowl has been reserved and that the caterer has been notified of the location change? Please IM me today by 5pm Pacific Time to verify.

This isn’t the place to practice your stand-up act. Keep it pithy, and assume that no one will ever read more than the first sentence of anything you write. Making that first sentence strong and clear is easily the best way to interest your recipient in the second sentence and beyond.

Write a great Subject line

You can make it even easier for your recipient to immediately understand why you’ve sent them an email and to quickly determine what kind of response or action it requires. Compose a great “Subject:” line that hits the high points or summarizes the thrust of the message. Avoid “Hi,” “One more thing…,” or “FYI,” in favor of typing a short summary of the most important points in the message:

  • Lunch resched to Friday @ 1pm
  • Reminder: Monday is "St. Bono’s Day"—no classes
  • REQ: Resend Larry Tate zip file?
  • HELP: Can you defrag my C drive?
  • Thanks for the new liver—works great!

In fact, if you’re relating just a single fact or asking one question in your email, consider using just the subject line to relate your message. As I’ve mentioned before, in some organizations, such emails are identified by adding (EOM)—for end of message—at the end of the Subject line. This lets recipients see that the whole message is right there in the subject without clicking to the view the (non-existent) body. This is highly appreciated by people who receive a large volume of mail, since it lets them do a quick triage on your message without needing to conduct a full examination.

Sadly, good email subjects have become something of a lost art, especially among more recent additions to the Interweb. It’s a pity, because you’re far more likely to get a favorable response from a busy person when they can quickly grok your message.

Brevity is the soul of…getting a response

It’s completely depressing to check your email at 4:55 in the afternoon to discover a gothic novel of a message waiting for you, spilling down your screen the distance of 2 or 3 scrolling pages. It’s certainly not the kind of thing that excites the desire to engage and respond. I mean just look at all that!

So, although—in typical Merlin fashion—I have only anecdotal evidence and hunches to prove this point, I’d wager that there’s one visual trick most likely to improve your message’s success: fit it onto one screen with no scrolling. There’s a reason those web ads placed “above the fold” cost a lot more than the ones stuck down at the bottom; it’s the only part of the page that you’re virtually assured that anyone will see.

Whenever you can, try to distill your beautiful epistle down to just one or two points about a given topic, and then whittle that down to the point where there’s plenty of white space left underneath your closing. Got more to say? Put it in separate emails with—again—excellent Subject lines, and a descriptive, concise opener.

What’s the action here?

If your message includes any kind of request—whether for a meeting, a progress update, a pony ride, or what have you—put that request near the top of the message and clearly state when you will need it. Do not, under any circumstances, assume that your overwhelmed recipient will take the time to sift through your purple prose for clues about what they’re supposed to be doing for you.

Depending on the style of your team and the volume of mail they create, you might even consider adding functional text headers to the top of the body outlining the exact nature of the message.

This email is:    [ ] actionable   [x] fyi        [ ] social
Response needed:  [ ] yes          [x] up to you  [ ] no 
Time-sensitive:   [ ] immediate    [ ] soon       [x] none

Sure, it’s geeky, but how many minutes have you wasted panning through a sloppy “project update” email only to completely miss the changed deadline or work request buried in the penultimate paragraph?

Remove the guesswork from your messages by thinking of them like friendly, civil work orders; you must not be afraid to ask for what you want, especially if you have any desire to actually have the recipient give it to you.

More good ideas

  • Make it easy to quote - Power email users will quote and respond to specific sections or sentences of your message. You can facilitate this by keeping your paragraphs short, making them easy to slice and dice.
  • Don’t chuck the ball - Emails to a thread are like comments at a meeting; think of both like your time possessing the basketball. Don’t just chuck at the net every chance you get. Hang back and watch for how you can be most useful. Minimize noise.
  • A reminder never hurts - If you’re following-up or responding to an email that’s more than a few days old, provide context right at the opening. For example, "You wrote in February asking to be notified when the new asthma inhalers are in stock; here’s a link to the items we’ve now made available on our site…."
  • Never mix, never worry - Unless your team really prefers to work that way, do not mix topics, projects, or domains of life in a given email. Inform everyone of Baby Tyler’s adorable antics in a different message than the one with the downsizing rumors and budget warnings.
  • No thanks - I’m not married to this one, but I know a lot of people who swear by it. In more informal settings and in high-volume mail environments, it’s not necessary to respond with a “Thanks” email whenever someone does what you asked. Save your gratitude for the next time you pass in the hall; a one-word “Thanks” email can be crufty and unnecessary. On the other hand, don’t hesitate to thank someone for their time if they’ve truly done you a proper.
  • RTFM - If you’re asking for help, make sure you’ve exhausted all the documentation and non-human resources you have at your disposal. When you do ask for help, be sure to quickly cover the solutions you’ve already tried and what the results were.
  • Skip the overture - If you’re writing to a busy person with an actual question or request, resist the desire to swoon for 2,000 characters. Either write a fan letter or a useful email, but mixing them can seem tacky and disingenuous. Just go ahead and ask Gary Gygax for his autograph already.

[Thanks to Cory for exchanges and thoughts that contributed to this.]


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Tommy Weir's picture

All good stuff. I...

All good stuff. I would add that having a range of signature files available is also a useful thing to set up. Different levels of contact details depending on what your relationship is with the recipient of the email.

david's picture

These are great tips! Thanks!...

These are great tips! Thanks! Here are a few others that might augment yours nicely:

1) Use To: and CC: lines to differentiate between people who have action items in an email and people for whom this is merely informative: I use this with my team, and my manager uses this as well. I filter mail by whether I’m on the To: line or the CC: line and know which ones I need to act on and which ones to read/review.

2) Change the subject if the thread has changed or if the original subject was too vague, but include the original subject parenthetically: If I’m included on a thread from someone with a subject like “FW: Help, please,??? and a reply from me is needed, I usually change the subject to something clearer, but include the original subject so that it’s clear to all that I’m not starting a completely new thread. I.e. I might change the aforementioned subject to “Samples needed for UK Customer (was RE: Help, please).??? The same thing can be done for threads that have wavered from their original theme, or if forwarding a poorly named email or thread to someone else – i.e. “Pls. review/approve these requests (was FW: Can you do this)???

Thanks again, there are some wonderful tips in here that I think I’ll start working towards today!

David

Josh Carter's picture

Awesome post! Dig the additions...

Awesome post! Dig the additions from Tommy and David, too. I’d add that URLs inline with text can make messages hard to read, so I usually separate them onto their own lines. For example, if the thrust of your message does not rely on the URLs, but you need them there to back up your point, just reference them with numbered brackets like [1] and [2]. Then below the message body you can put:

  [1] 43 Folders: Hipster PDA
  http://url.goes.here
  [2] Other reference link
  http://url2.goes.here
Torley Wong/Torley Torgeson's picture

I came here from Boing...

I came here from Boing Boing… wow, that’s really handy! A veritable clip-and-save. I’ve been doing what Josh Carter suggests about the URLs for awhile now too. :)

William Pietri's picture

That's a lot of good...

That’s a lot of good stuff! But I disagree completely about the subject line being the only message.

When I’m in high-volume email mode, I’m reading and responding to one message after another; there’s no clicking to view the body. I focus on the message first, and the blank message body is jarring. I agree that the subject line should be a concise summary, so that scanning a list or searching will work well. But if somebody can’t take the time to send me an entire sentence, I find it harder to work up the energy to give them a proper response.

Liam Delahunty's picture

Acronyms that may be useful...

Acronyms that may be useful shorthand in subjects: * EOM End Of Message * RR Response required * AR Action Required * ATTACH Contains attachemnt * PERS Personal * CONT Continued * MEET Meeting * MINUTES Message contains minutes of meeting.

Using these is viral, one you start to use the system, it’ll spread throughout the organisation.

Have a web page set up on your intranet about the acronyms and other email usage tips and whenever someone asks, point them to it. http://www.liamdelahunty.com/tips/using_email.php (old old old!)

JonathanPeterson's picture

A structured writting class I...

A structured writting class I took had a good suggestion re: emails that I’ll add.

When you have multiple things in an email (say a project status), write a concise summary graph followed by an index with the major items: 1) Ad Copy Delayed 2) Server Configuration Complete 3) Awaiting Client sign-off

Then use the same topics as section headers - that way a large list of readers can quickly jump to the things that interest them.

joe's picture

Great tips. One additional thing I've...

Great tips.

One additional thing I’ve found absolultely critical is to make sure I don’t bury two or three important points in one dense paragraph.

I’ve had editors completely miss my requests for information because they seem to read the first sentence of each paragraph, answer the question, then move on. You have to write like your recipient has a severe attention-deficit disorder.

Thus: a few short paragraphs are way more effective than one long one made of the exactly same sentences.

Go through your finished email and hit Return whenever you spot a critical idea or request.

PaulD's picture

joe - I use that...

joe - I use that approach as well, and I appreciate it when others separate key points that way too. It’s a really simple way to make an e-mail more digestible.

We have a friend whose e-mails are one ginormous paragraph, full of run-on sentences to boot. I’ll literally put the cursor at the end of random sentences and hit Enter, just to break it up a bit.

Chris's picture

I'm forwarding the text of...

I’m forwarding the text of this post (and the URL citation) to everyone in my department. This is Power Email 101. AWESOME.

About Merlin Mann

Merlin Mann's picture

Bio

Merlin Mann is an independent writer, speaker, and broadcaster. He’s best known for being the guy who started the website you’re reading right now. He lives in San Francisco, does lots of public speaking, and helps make cool things like You Look Nice Today. Also? He looks like this, answers questions, and has something like a life.

Merlin’s favorite thing he’s written recently is a short essay called, “Better.”

 
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